I want to share with you a story. I believe it’s a very powerful story.
You know when you’re really focused on doing something or achieving something and even though you won’t stop at getting it because you really really want that thing that you’re working towards, but the whole time you’re having these really big doubts and fears and questioning yourself and questioning why the hell isn’t this working??
Who’s been there? Who knows exactly what I’m talking about? I’m sure we’ve all experienced something like that!
Well in recent months I have experienced just that.
With my health.
For the last 13 years, I have struggled with my health after being diagnosed with multiple autoimmune diseases. I have had times when I’ve been so chronically ill that I haven’t been able to function or look after myself and having spent weeks and months at a time, sick in bed, with a whole variety of symptoms, and if it wasn't for my Doctors and medications who saved my life I probably wouldn't be here today.
And yet in the last 4 years, I have been managing things pretty well. I’ve had the occasional small flare-up to deal with, but nothing like where I was at during the worst chronic stages.
You see, I’ve poured a lot of time and energy into my healing journey over the years. And I have discovered many modalities along the way to help with my recovery.
And when I discovered coaching and hypnosis, that’s when my healing started to accelerate and together with the help of my naturopath, and in dealing with past traumas, emotions and negative beliefs I had been holding on to, I was able to come off medications and radically change my life.
And yet I’ve always had this underlying fear coming with me that I would get sick again. Not just that, but that I would get so sick and not be able to live my best life anymore.
I have had a few knocks and setbacks the last couple of years and so it didn’t really surprise me when I ended up with a kidney infection recently.
What did surprise me though was that my Rheumatologist told me that it was likely that Lupus was now attacking my kidneys and I would have to go on some hardcore medication for the rest of my life otherwise I’d end up on dialysis.
As I’ve been doing things pretty naturally these last few years, since doing some amazing work with my naturopath and being free of medications, the thought of going back on a toxic cocktail of chemicals did not appeal to me at all. In fact, it terrified me.
Knowing that I was going to be spending the next 3 weeks having rounds of tests for my kidneys and other organs and endometrial stuff I’d also been going through, I went back to my naturopath, got the right herbs to support me and thus started a rigorous routine of emotional and energetic clearing.
Because what do we know about the mind/body connection? We know that everything is connected and whenever there is some pain or illness in the body, it is our body sending signals and messages, telling us to wake up and listen to what’s really going on.
So I looked up all the emotional connections to do with autoimmune, lupus, kidneys, endometriosis, inflammation, fatigue, nausea, pain etc and the list goes on.
And I used the many incredible processes I have learnt in my studies for clearing of what we call the “negative emotions” such as fear, frustration, guilt, struggle, resentment and so on. I used my Matrix Therapies skills, NLP, Colour therapy, Sound Healing, Reiki, grounding and energetic work and of course Meditation and Visualisation exercises.
And even though I was doing this kind of work every day, I still had that underlying fear.
“What if I’m so sick I have to be medicated? What if I’m so sick I do have to go see that kidney doctor and get a biopsy? What if my tests come back positive for cancer?”
After being told I was being tested for anything cancerous, I actually rushed home and started writing my Will straight away, telling myself that I was actually being very practical in planning ahead! Fun, huh?
Until one night at 4 am when I couldn’t sleep, I decided to treat my fear like a negative influence on my life and I cut the chords to it, determined that this fear was not going to hold me back anymore.
Isn’t it amazing though that when we have made such great friends with an emotion such as fear, how challenging it is to actually let go of it?
So the weeks went by and I slept a lot as my body and mind system were processing all of the work I was doing and I could tell even in my dreams that the work was going on behind the scenes!
And when I finally walked into my Rheumatologist’s office for my results (thinking the absolute worst possible outcome) and he read the notes from my last visit and straight-up asked me what medication I wanted to go on and I said to him definitely “none”, well, that was when things got really interesting!
He started going through my test results, asking me a whole bunch of questions and then got me to stand up and do some flexibility tests etc and then he sat down, looked me in the eyes and said:
“Well whatever you’re doing, keep doing it because I don’t think you even have Lupus anymore”.
I was like “What????"
So many question marks! "What???"
“What do you mean? How is that even possible?”
He said “Your Lupus antibodies have come back as negative”
For the first time in 13 years of struggling with chronic illness, this blessed music to my ears was such a huge surprise that I honestly could not even believe it! I could barely take the information in!
And it took me days and days to process these wonderful results!
The fact that I have actually healed myself.
It DOES work.
Yes, it’s taken mammoth effort on my part. My journey has not been easy by any means. In fact, sometimes, it's been so bloody hard as I've cried so many tears, spent so much time in bed and shed so many layers.
But I am one determined lady who will do whatever it takes to reach my goal.
And my goal of being healthy and strong is now my reality.
I have healed from Lupus. I have healed from Endometriosis.
Not using any drugs or medications.
Just doing everything naturally – working with herbs and supplements, meditating, working on my mindset and healing my past traumas and emotional health. And that has been the most important part.
Especially for someone like me who has been through a lot of trauma and stress has carried those traumas and stress in my mind/body system for decades until I was finally ready to release them.
I still have work to do. I am still fatigued and every day I am strengthening myself and increasing my daily activity and meditation and I will keep doing my self-healing work so I can be the very best of myself and be able to share my story with others.
Because if I can do it, then you can too. It’s hard, yes, but damn, it is so worth it.
And shit yeah, I’ve wanted to give up soooo many times!
But how I would be leading with love, if I was to give up on myself?
For me, this has been one epic journey of self-love, self-care, discovering my true self-worth and doing whatever it takes to create and recreate a me who I am happy with and proud of, and ready to show the world who I really am.
I am sharing my story with you because I want you to see how far I’ve come and that with a bit, (or maybe a lot!) of work, that you can heal too. And I can be here for you to help you on your journey.
So please get in touch if you are struggling with any health, emotional or energetic challenges and I would love to help you on your own path of self-healing and self-love. I can teach you how to clear past traumas and emotions associated with them and for you to move forward feeling strong and healthy in body/ mind and soul.